Today I read a story in the New York Post that you may have missed. “Dr. Ian Jenkins and his partners, Jeremy Hodges and Dr. Alan Mayfield — a polyamorous throuple — made history in 2017 when they became the first family in the state to list three parents on a birth certificate.” The article glowed about Dr. Jenkins’ new book and ongoing normal lifestyle. The article revisits the throuple’s relations and the thoughts of a their young daughter named Piper. What makes this article alarming is that we seem to have accepted three facts:
- First, it is totally acceptable to live a life of marital fulfillment in a same gender relationship and not a single person anywhere bats an eye.
- Second, polygamy is ok. It is legal to be three people in a marriage and three people on a birth certificate. Monogamy is for close-minded, old-schooled, fuddy-duddies. The created design, that a person leaves his or her father and mother and joined together is now ludicrous and phobic!
- Third, children are happier in fluid relationships. Ms. Dellatto writes, “Now in preschool, Piper sees her daddies as a source of pride. She told a classmate, ‘You have two parents. I have three parents.'” It seems that we are to be perfectly O.K. with this upside down family and celebrate it.
The fact that we actually have a word, throuple, in our culture and are using to describe a happy family is the challenge for the church. It is not possible for more than one man in this throuple to be the biological parent of the baby, yet the law allows the other two to be listed on the birth certificate having no DNA in the parental world. Therefore, does science dictate parenthood, or does an emotion based on feelings make a parent. Why, then, could a dog not be listed as a parent? It is the actual existence of this issue that shows how far the church is moving from cultural normativity. The church is missing the opportunity to meld minds of our young people because they are being fed this thought line every day in school and in the media. When was the last time a T.V. show described a father figure who was masculine but sensitive and loving while not being a buffoon? Is there a current show that does not highlight at least one major character pursuing a homosexual lifestyle? I even saw a cartoon on Disney plus all about coming out and how much better it is to be in the rainbow lifestyle.
The proposition to our churches is, how do we love our neighbor and yet not celebrate lifestyles antithetical to scripture? We are called to love. We are called to be in the world but not of it. The throupling is sin equal to stealing, lying, and wanting other peoples’ stuff. Sin is sin and we should have no partiality of the sinners in our pews. But, folks, I am broken. I am broken by the sin, broken by our culture’s acceptance of sin. I am simply overwhelmed for our churches. If you have any ideas, are willing to speak with grace and love, feel free to comment.